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Why hot buttons work & what to do

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Have you noticed how your kids will behave one way to you but not to your partner. They may whine at you to get what they want, but they wouldn’t do the same to your partner.    Maybe they’ll cry for your partner when they have done the wrong thing, but they won’t cry for you as they know that tears won’t work.    As the good TV professor Dr. Julius Sumner-Miller would say, “Why is it so?”   Kids tend to keep the behaviours that work in terms of getting a desirable response from adults, and discard those that don’t get a response. This may sound like a devious plot, but it’s just human nature.   The Austrian psychologist Alfred Adler calls this ‘purposeful behaviour’. That is, kids like adults, repeat the behaviours that get a response and discard those that don’t work. ...(sign-up as a member to continue reading this article)

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